I don’t believe in love anymore.

And then I talk to you and remember how I felt with you, and mention all of these people that care about, and want me, and you don’t react. I loved you more than anything else in the entire world, and you could never grasp that. 

Remember the day you told me you were going to kill yourself? I listened to New Year Son by The Amazing Broken Man all day, and could barely make it without collapsing on the floor in tears. I couldn’t bare to be in this world without you. But when I needed you, you couldn’t bare me. That’s what love is to me. From that moment on, it’ll forever be my insanity, unhappiness, and anger towards a concept that is fantasy. That people will stay with me, and love me through anything. Someone who will help me when I need it most, and love me, and hold me. All of it is just nonsense and garbage, because I gave everything into it, and absolutely nothing came out of it.

Love destroys me. You destroy me.